《少年谢尔顿》前情提要 Previously on Young Sheldon...
我和康妮分手后 第一次见到她 I saw Connie for the first time since I broke up with her,
所以我不禁思考 她是否也感到孤独寂寞 and it's making me wonder if she also is feeling lonely,
我为我们所做的决定是否错了呢 and I made a bad decision for both of us.
我也不想当告诉你坏消息的人 约翰 I hate to be the one to tell you this, John,
她现在有新的约会对象了 but she's kind of been seeing someone new.
她好像过得挺好 She seems to be doing okay.
我也希望他迷失在大海上 永远回不来 Oh, I hope he gets lost at sea and never returns!
我现在心情非常复杂 I'm having a lot of feelings.
你好啊 康妮 Hey. Connie.
所以我就过来... 来打个招呼 I thought I'd just, uh... say "Hi."
我要是邀请她一起看会不会尴尬呢 Would it be awkward if I asked her to join us?
再尴尬也尴尬不过现在 Oh, couldn't be any more awkward.
从很多方面来看 In many ways,
高中就是一个学术的恐怖屋 a high school is like an academic house of horrors.
比如食堂 There's the cafeteria,
哪怕是刚打扫过 which when even freshly cleaned,
空气中都还隐隐飘着薯球跟呕吐的气味 maintains a subtle aroma of tater tots and throw-up.
还有学校操场 你得暴露在 The schoolyard, where one is exposed
校园恶霸的面前 还得小心 to bullying by delinquents and attacks from above
来自空中戳眼恶魔的攻击 by eye-pecking demons.
但这些都比不上 But all of these pale in comparison
学校中最令人发指的场所 to the most horrific location of all.
这里布满着汗水与上百个 A place teeming with the sweat and secretions
没清洗过的肉体身上的分泌物 from hundreds of unwashed bodies.
校园泳池 The swimming pool.
抱歉 谢尔顿 水上安全课 Sorry, Sheldon. Water safety is a required
是你的体育课中必修的项目 part of your P.E. Class.
但其他孩子也用那个游泳池 But other kids use that pool.
那基本就是一大锅青少年汤 It's basically a big bowl of teenager soup.
我也没办法啊 这是州立规定 It's out of my hands. It's a state requirement.
如果你有意见 那你去跟区议员谈啊 If you don't like it, take it up with your congressman.
我试过了 I did.
他都不回我电话 He won't return my calls.
那明天你是非游不可了 Then I guess you're swimming tomorrow.
除了没有这笑声 发光的双眼 Except for the laughter, the glowing eyes
以及闪电 其他的都是真的 and the lightning, that's exactly how it happened.
♪ 世上没人比我强壮 ♪ ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
原创翻译 双语字幕
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翻译 泳池水怪佩妮赛 油腻希
♪ 昨天我移了一座山 ♪ ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
校对 乐高蝙蝠赛太公
♪ 我相信我能当你的英雄 ♪ ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
后期 灰灰是菇凉 时间轴 加森
♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
总监 新浪微博@赛太公
♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
少 年
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我有点紧张 I'm a little nervous.
你是我第一个维持朋友关系的前任 You're the first ex-girlfriend I've ever been friends with.
也是我第一个前女友 And you're also my first ex-girlfriend.
那是因为你... And that's because you...
你可不可以就把我当成是你的朋友 How about you just think of me as your friend?
可以 没问题 这样很好 Okay. Yes, that's good.
对了 我听说你有新的交往对象啦 So, I understand you're seeing someone new.
快跟我八卦一下 Tell me everything.
不要 No!
不是说好了我们是朋友吗 I assumed that, uh, as friends,
朋友间可以互相分享私人生活啊 we could tell each other about our personal lives.
约翰 你相信我 你不会想听这些细节的 Trust me, John, you-you don't want to hear about these things.
我真心想听 Actually, I do.
我很在乎你幸不幸福 Your happiness is very important to me.
行吧 随你便 Oh, what the hell.
他的名字叫戴尔 His name is Dale.
他开了一家体育用品店 He owns a sporting goods store.
我们只约出去过几次 And we've only been out a few times,
但目前来说 处得还挺开心 but so far, so good.
那很好啊 Well, that sounds wonderful.
恭喜你 Good for you.
谢谢 Thank you.
那现在你有兴趣听我说我在交往的女人吗 Now, would you like to hear about the women I'm dating?
你跟新的女人交往了吗 You're dating other women?
才没有呢 Heavens, no.
帮个忙啊 耶稣 你的生日你帮个手嘛 Come on, Jesus. This is for your birthday. Help me out.
妈呀 谢尔顿对游泳这事反应可真大 Boy, Sheldon is really worked up about this whole swimming thing.
你不觉得他该为自己的安全而学吗 Don't you think he should learn for his own safety?
你真的觉得他这辈子会想去接近水域吗 You really think he's ever gonna go near a body of water?
不是不去 时候未到 Yeah. It's only a matter of time
迟早会碰到有人把他扔下水 before someone throws him in one.
你温柔点跟他说这消息吧 Well, break it to him gently.
等等 我去说吗 Wait-- Me?
游泳是种运动 你是搞运动的 Swimming's a sport, and you're a sports person.
他是个小妈宝 而你是他妈妈 And he's a mama's boy, and you're his mama.
那我们一起去怎么样 How about we do it together?
行 但你不能到时候坑我背锅 Fine, but you can't hang me out to dry.
当然不会 Of course not.
我们是个团队 同生共死 对吧 We're a team. We're in this together, right?
那当然 You bet.
他绝对会推我去死 She's gonna hang me out to dry.
巴拉德体育用品店
观察是做科学很重要的一部分 Observation is an important part of the scientific method.
达尔文观察了雀类 Darwin observed the finches,
珍·古德观察了黑猩猩 Jane Goodall observed the chimpanzees,
而不知为何 and for some reason,
斯特吉斯博士想观察姥姥的新对象 Dr. Sturgis wanted to observe my meemaw's new suitor.
麻烦稍等我一下 Excuse me just for one second.
你好 有什么需要吗 Howdy. Can I help you?
没什么 我就是随便看看 No, no, just browsing.
你是玩哪种运动想要用到那个呢 Yeah, well, any particular sport you might need that for?
看情况了 这是什么鬼 Depends. What the heck is it?
是个护裆[杯子] It's a cup.
杯子吗 A cup?
什么杯子会有这么多漏洞啊 What kind of a cup has holes in it?
这是拿来保护你私密部位的啦 Well, it protects your private parts.
那我看出它有用的地方了 Well, I can see how that might be useful.
感谢你十分有料的讲解 Well, this has been very informative.
谢谢你 Thank you.
不客气 You're welcome.
如果... You just, uh...
如果还有别的问题 你就来问我 If you have any more questions, you let me know.
一定会 I certainly will.
好的 All right.
小乔治 你帮我注意一下那边那个怪人 Georgie, I want you to keep an eye on that weirdo over there.
我认识那个怪人 他是我姥姥前男友 I know that weirdo. He used to date my meemaw.
那家伙吗 That guy?
是啊 他超级聪明 Yeah, he's, like, super smart.
我有点不敢信你的话 I'm not sure I believe you.
斯特吉斯博士 Hey, Dr. Sturgis.
你好啊 Hello!
不对 惨了 Wait. Uh-oh.
您好 Hello.
我貌似做了一些 I may have made a questionable,
对我们友谊不太好的决定 uh, decision regarding our friendship.
你又干嘛了 约翰 What have you done, John?
我去了体育用品店 I went to the sporting goods store
看看你的新对象 to check out your new fella.
你跟他说话了吗 Did you speak to him?
有啊 而且他还成功跟我推销了 Oh, yes. In fact, he sold me an athletic supporter
保护我私处的运动器材 to protect my genitals.
很好 Good.
下次让我见到你之前你最好戴上它 You may want to be wearing that next time I see you.
好的 Okay.
谢利 你能先关掉电视一下吗 Shelly, can you turn the TV off for a second?
但广告结束之后 But after this commercial break,
质子教授要用一根蜡烛 Professor Proton is going to use a candle
把一个水煮蛋给吸进牛奶瓶里呢 to suck a hard-boiled egg into a milk bottle.
我们尽快说完 We'll make it quick.
说吧 Go ahead.
你爸爸有事情想跟你说 Your father has something to tell you.
-你妈妈要你去游泳 -乔治 - Your mother wants you to swim. - ‭George!
妈 Mom!
都准备好来吸蛋了吗 Who's ready to suck eggs?
这真是我看过最弱鸡的发火了 That was the lamest tantrum I've ever seen.
我被强迫明天体育课得游泳 I'm being forced to swim tomorrow in P.E.
好可怜哦 你只能去泳池里玩 Poor baby. You have to play in a pool
不能坐在教室里 instead of sit in a classroom.
一池子的汗水 细菌以及死皮细胞 A pool of sweat, germs and dead skin cells.
还是比上课好啊 Still better than learning.
或许是时候我该逃家 Maybe it's time for me to run away from home
去加入旅行数学俱乐部了 and join a traveling math club.
你就装病就行啦 Just pretend to be sick.
但那是在说谎 我不是骗子 But that would be lying. I'm not a liar.
那你最好是个游泳健将 Well, you better be a swimmer.
或是溺死鬼 Or a drowner.
你为什么不喜欢我 Why don't you like me?
你满是细菌 You're full of bacteria.
你身上也有 但我就不会鄙视你 因为很没礼貌 So are you, but you don't hear me saying, "Ugh." It's rude.
虽然我只是泳池水 Look, I may just be pool water,
但我也有感情啊 but I still have feelings.
对不起 泳池水 Sorry, water.
来嘛 Come on.
我的酸碱度是7.4 My PH level is 7.4,
并含有百万分之3的氯 and with three parts per million of chlorine,
我比你爸爸感恩节晚餐后的盘子还干净 I'm cleaner than your daddy's plate after Thanksgiving dinner.
那是真的很干净了 Wow. That's pretty clean.
你看我有多清澈 谢尔顿 Look how clear I am, Sheldon.
你能一眼望到池底 You can see all the way to the bottom.
再近一点 Closer.
再近一点 A little closer.
抓到你啦 Gotcha!
泳池水怪 Pool monster!
我不太舒服 I don't feel well.
怎么啦 小宝贝 What's wrong, baby?
不知道 就感觉很不舒服 I don't know. I just feel awful.
最近的确好像有什么病在传染 Well, there is something going around.
比利·斯巴克斯好像就染上了什么虫 Billy Sparks got some kind of bug.
这跟我的说法十分符合 很好 That is consistent with what I said. Good.
那你今天在家休养 You're staying home today.
我去给你泡杯茶 I'll go make you some tea.
欢迎加入邪恶阵营 Welcome to the dark side.
妈妈说你生病了 Mom says you're sick.
他在装病 He's faking.
真的假的 Really?
为什么 你不是很喜欢上学吗 Why? You love school.
游泳测验 Swim test.
懂了 你绝对会死 Oh, sure. You would die.
如果你要装病 那我来指点你几招 If you're gonna do this, let me give you some pointers.
你这么做过吗 You've done this before?
告诉他 Tell him.
他可是大师 Oh, he's the master.
他可是我前两次... He coached me through my last two...
喉咙痛的幕后执导 sore throats.
那两次我都去沙发上睡觉了呢 I slept on the couch during those.
我知道啊 I know.
首先呢 First of all,
妈妈不在你房间时你也得咳嗽 you got to cough even when Mom's not in the room.
懂了 Got it.
别把温度计放到茶里来提升温度 And don't put the thermometer in the tea.
烧到45℃太假了 114 fever is a giveaway.
-聪明 -我就说吧 - Smart. - Told you.
她要看你的喉咙就放胆让她看 Oh, don't be afraid to let her look in your throat.
她是想看看有没有发炎红肿 She's checking to see if it's red,
但本来就一直是红色的啊 but it's always red.
你真的很厉害 You are good.
来 试着吐点痰出来 Here, try spitting up a little phlegm.
功夫还不够啊 We got work to do.
我相信他明天就会好多了 I'm sure he'll feel better tomorrow.
他今天需要做的作业就给他哥哥 And you can send any homework that he needs to do
让他带回来就行了 with his brother.
谢谢你 Thank you.
你不觉得这一切太巧合了吗 Doesn't this all seem a little convenient?
你觉得他是在装病吗 You think he's faking it?
今天有游泳考试 Today's the swim test.
真的很可疑啊 It's pretty suspicious.
谢尔顿刚往纸巾里咳出了一些很恶心的东西 Sheldon just coughed up something gross in a tissue.
看见没 See?
所以他必须待在家里休息 And that's why he's staying home.
玛丽 别天真了 Mary, come on.
不 我不会改变主意的 No, I am not changing my mind.
我的小宝贝可不是撒谎精 My little boy is not a liar.
康妮·塔克吗 Connie Tucker?
-是的 -这是给您的 - Yeah. - ‭Here you go.
-谢谢你 -不客气 - Well, thank you. - ‭You're welcome.
"我的行为超越了友谊的底线 "I overstepped The bounds of friendship."
对不起 约翰" Sorry. John."
喂 Hello?
你的前男友为什么 So, why in the hell would your ex-boyfriend
要寄一块巨型曲奇给我 send me a giant cookie?
抱歉 我监视了你 约翰
我的小宝贝可不是撒谎精 My little boy is not a liar.
你没发烧啊 You don't have a temperature.
这是好事 你想舒舒服服躺在沙发上 That's good. You want to get comfy on the couch
看你的《星际旅行》录像带吗 and watch your Star Trek tapes?
不用了 谢谢 No, thank you.
我知道做什么能让你好受点 I know what'll make you feel better.
♪ 软猫猫 暖猫猫 ♪ ♪ Soft kitty, warm kitty ♪
♪ 小毛球猫猫 ♪ ♪ Little ball of fur ♪
♪ 笑猫猫 ♪ ♪ Happy kitty ♪
♪ 困猫猫 ♪ ♪ Sleepy kitty ♪
♪ 呼噜呼噜呼噜 ♪ ♪ Purr, purr, purr ♪
♪ 软骗子 暖骗子 ♪ ♪ Soft liar, warm liar ♪
♪ 小毛球撒谎精 ♪ ♪ Little ball of fib ♪
♪ 笑骗子 困骗子 ♪ ♪ Happy liar, sleepy liar ♪
♪ 超级无敌撒谎精 ♪ ♪ Fib, fib, fib. ♪
好点了吗 Feel better?
并没有 Uh-uh.
不是吧 Really?
库珀请病假了 Cooper's out sick?
真是娇嫩的小婴儿 What a baby.
真的吗 库珀请病假了 Really? Cooper's out sick?
太爽啦 Oh, baby!
赞美上帝 Hallelujah!
真是过节了 Happy birthday to me.
谢利 我去杂货店一趟 Shelly, I'm gonna run to the grocery store real quick
买些煲汤的食材 so I can make you some soup.
好 Okay.
我欺骗了我妈妈 还逍遥法外 I had lied to my mother and gotten away with it.
内疚快把我吞噬了 The guilt was more than I could take.
我必须改正错误 I had to make this right.
我可以老实坦白 让我妈伤心难过 I could confess and break my mother's heart,
也可以把我的谎言变成事实 or I could turn my lie into the truth
真的把自己搞病 and actually get myself sick.
谢尔顿 你好啊 Hi, Sheldon.
你好 比利 我听说你不舒服 Hello, Billy. I hear you're not feeling well.
确实不舒服 我感冒了 I'm not. I have a cold.
真不幸 That's too bad.
伸出手来吧 Put her there.
为什么 Why?
跟我握手就是了 比利 Just shake my hand, Billy.
但我妈妈说这样会传播细菌 But my mom says that's how germs get spread.
-我知道 -真的吗 - I know. ‭- You do?
你几时和我妈聊过天了 When did you talk to my mom?
赶紧... Just, eh...
等等 你想一起玩吗 Wait, want to play?
是煮给你的小病人吃的吗 Is that for your patient?
是的 Yes.
他还是不舒服 He's still under the weather.
太惨咯 Oh, that's too bad.
他有没有发烧 Running a fever?
没有 No.
有没有流鼻水 Sniffly nose?
也没有 No.
但他连看《星际旅行》都没精神 But he couldn't even bring himself to watch his Star Trek show.
那么严重呀 那我该叫救护车了 Oh, dear. I better go call an ambulance.
你这样并不好笑 You're not funny.
他根本没病 And he ain't sick.
-干杯 -干杯 - Cheers. - ‭Cheers.
别急着点吃的 Now, don't fill up on those.
我们还有两块巨型曲奇没吃完呢 We still got two giant cookies to finish.
很抱歉约翰做出那些事 I'm sorry about all that stuff with John.
他是好意 但有时 I... He means well, but sometimes
他这人就是有点...古怪 he can just be, uh... A little quirky.
我看出来了 Yeah, I kind of figured that;
我看到他和自己裆部对打乒乓球 yeah, I watched him play ping-pong with his own crotch.
我不知道那是怎么一回事 但我不意外 I don't know what that is, but I'm sure he did it.
你到底是怎么遇见这人的 Well, I mean, how'd you meet this guy?
难不成你试图在彩虹尽头 What, did you try to steal his pot of gold
爱尔兰小矮妖的传说
偷走他的金罐吗 at the end of the rainbow?
别揶揄了 他是个很好的人 Okay, okay, he's a very sweet man.
我相信他是 Well, I bet he is.
如果你非要知道 If you must know,
他是谢尔顿的大学教授 he's Sheldon's college professor.
聪明 个儿矮 还古怪 Smart, short and weird--
他可真是完美的对象 well, that's the whole package right there. ‭
别再说了 够了 Hey, okay, that's enough.
我一定要问 Well, I got to ask.
你现在是不是觉得自己 Do you feel like you're dating
在跟酷帅超模约会 a supermodel right now?
汤你一口都没喝过呢 宝贝 You didn't touch your soup, baby.
我不饿 I'm not hungry.
你没有好一些吗 You aren't feelin' any better?
我先放到冰箱里 Well, it'll be in the fridge
你迟点想喝就告诉我 if you change your mind.
年轻人 Young man.
没错 就是你 Yes, you.
居然装病 Pretending to be sick.
你应该感到羞耻 You should be ashamed of yourself!
但我害怕进泳池 But I was afraid to go in the pool.
你现在就深陷池子里 You are in a pool.
你自己的谎言之池 A pool of your own deceit.
如果我母亲还活着 If my mother were alive,
我绝不会欺骗她 I'd never lie to her.
我也会把她辛苦煮的汤喝光光 And I'd always eat her soup.
我孙子想偷回本垒 My grandson's trying to steal home,
他不小心被绊倒了 一头摔到本垒板上 and he trips and he falls and lands face-first on the plate,
掉了颗牙 我们赢得了那场比赛 lost a tooth, we won the game.
精彩的来了 Get this.
他两天后找到了那颗牙 He finds the tooth two days later...
就在他上大号时 when he goes to the bathroom.
就这反应 That's it?
你没听懂 You don't understand.
他找到了牙齿... He found the tooth...
我听懂了 I got it.
怎么了 你还好吗 What's going on? You okay?
其实我不好 Actually, no.
我不喜欢你谈论约翰的语气 I don't like the way you've been talkin' about John.
我只是开玩笑啦 I was kidding around.
但是让我很不舒服 Well, it bothered me.
等一下 打住 打住 Wait a minute, hold it, hold, hold, hold.
你的怪咖前男友偷偷摸摸地来监视我 Your weirdo ex comes sneaking around, checking me out,
怎么突然之间我却成了坏人 and all of a sudden, I'm the bad guy here?
你不准叫他怪咖 You don't get to call him a weirdo.
你不觉得他是怪咖吗 You don't think he's a weirdo?
他当然是怪咖 Of course he's a weirdo.
但你不能说出来 You just can't say it.
我没想到这事有这么严重 Oh, I didn't think it was that big a deal.
就有 我和他是朋友 Well, it is. He and I are friends,
如果你再继续嘲笑他 and if you don't stop makin' fun of him,
我和你就没完了 you and I are gonna have a problem.
你意思是我不乖 Are you saying that I'm being naughty,
你威胁要惩罚人家吗 and you're threatening to punish me?
我可能会很享受哦 'Cause I might like that.
瞧 你想生我的气 但你做不到 See, you're tryin' to be mad at me and you can't.
现在你绝对要被惩罚调教了 Now you are getting punished.
麻烦买单 Check, please!
妈妈 Mom.
宝贝 你怎么起床了 Oh, baby. What are you doing out of bed?
我不需要躺在床上休息 I don't need to be in bed.
我没生病 I'm not sick.
什么 What?
我欺骗了你 I lied to you
因为我想逃避游泳考试 so that I wouldn't have to take the swim test.
你说谎了 You lied?
我觉得很内疚 I feel terrible about it.
你当然该感到内疚 Well, you should feel terrible.
我那么相信你 I trusted you.
对不起 但我真的太害怕进入泳池 I'm sorry. It's just that I was so afraid to get in that pool,
所以我让小乔治和米希教我如何装病 so I let Georgie and Missy teach me how to fake it.
他们说很简单 但并不简单 They said it was easy, but it's wasn't.
一点都不简单 It really wasn't.
小乔治和米希教你怎么装病的吗 Georgie and Missy taught you how to do this?
我绝对不能说谎 就是他们干的 I cannot tell a lie-- they sure did!
好了 别激动 Okay, calm down.
听我说 你不应该说谎 Now, you listen to me, you shouldn't have lied.
说谎任何时候都是错的 It's always wrong.
但现在你告诉我真相 弥补了自己的过错 But you made up for it by telling me the truth.
那你原谅我了吗 So, you forgive me?
是的 但是 I do, but...
我需要你帮我一个忙 I need you to do me a favor.
在你爸面前 继续装病 As far as your father is concerned, you were sick.
那不算欺骗吗 Isn't that lying?
老实说 Honestly?
不算 No.
第二天 我回到学校 The following day, I returned to school.
我别无选择 只得乖乖下水游泳 I had no choice but to fulfill my swimming requirement.
就像蝙蝠侠一样 Much like Batman,
我穿上全套战服 直面我的恐惧 I suited up and faced my fears.
但没有蝙蝠侠那么英勇 我只是用狗爬式 Unlike Batman, I did it with a doggy-paddle
游过泳池浅水区 across the shallow end of the pool.
至于泳池的卫生情况 Uh, regarding pool sanitation,
结果证明我是对的 it turned out I was right.
里面充满了大量细菌 It was teeming with germs.
只不过细菌都是我放进去的 Only I was the one who put them there.
原来 As it happens,
我和比利·斯帕克斯的接触 my interaction with Billy Sparks
果然让我染上病了 did get me sick.
我因此制造了一场小流行病 I, in turn, created a small epidemic
放倒了128名学生 taking down 128 students,
四名教师 four teachers...
以及一位校长 and one principal.
还不止这样 It didn't stop there.
我还传染给了我妈妈 I also infected my mother,
我爸爸 father,
我姐我哥 sister, brother,
姥姥 Meemaw...
以及姥姥的朋友戴尔 and Meemaw's friend Dale.
最新制定的友谊界限 The newliest established boundries of friendship
帮助斯特吉斯博士保持健康 helped keep doctor Sturgis healthy.
然而 在一场与之无关的意外中 However, in an unrelated incident,
他骑单车撞向了垃圾桶 he crashed his bike in some garbage cans.
幸运的是 他最近购买的运动护裆保护了他 Luckily, he landed on his recently acquired athletic cup.
这护裆真是买对了 That was a wise pruchase.